Just listen to me!
We all need a good listening to from time to time. This year, with all the challenges we have faced during 2020, we need it more than ever. At the same time, we have been less able to be around friends and spend time together, so although we have the phone, zoom, social media and a variety of other platforms, it’s been a lonely time for many.
Human beings need each other: we are interdependent creatures. Yet, the society we live in right now, often leads us to think we should be able to do it all on our own and that needing others is a sign of weakness.
Not so. Sharing what is going on for us can feel vulnerable, but as Brené Brown says in her book Rising Strong:
“Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.”
Sharing what is going on for us, being seen and heard may feel a bit vulnerable at first, but it’s amazing what a good listening to can do for us. When someone listens without judgement, we can feel a sense of being accompanied and less alone. And when we share out loud what is going on in our lives, we can gain more clarity about what is important to us. Even when all the listener does is just be there.
As a listener, it can be hard to see others in pain and we want to help. We might feel helpless, want to offer solutions or share our stories to let the speaker know we understand. Often, the best gift we can give to another is to just be there. Don’t just do something. Be there! Offer your presence as a gift and just be a listening companion. It can be a great relief to realise that you don’t have to fix anything and to know that that you can make a difference by simply listening.
The Listening Project
As part of The Listening Project, we will explore how to create space for others, how to listen and how to take care of ourselves so we don’t get bogged down by what we hear. We’ll need lots of practice so there will be lots of chances to be heard as part of the course.
At the end of the course we will partner you with someone else who has taken part so that you can become listening partners and continue to provide listening support for each other. So no matter what life throws at you, you will have someone to listen. This could also include sharing when things are going well.
The course will not only enable you to improve your listening skills and have the opportunity to be heard – the skills you will learn can be invaluable in daily life in being able to hear more clearly what is important to others, and to fully listen and understand before responding.
This course will take place online and is free of charge. It begins on Monday February 15th, with sessions running on the Mondays of March 1st, 15th and 29th.
The times are 1pm – 2.30pm, with a commitment to practice with a partner in between sessions.
The final session is April 26th.